An Open Letter to my Friends

Over the past two years or so, my narcolepsy has gotten worse.  It is ironic that I have decided to write this at the end of the week where I have felt the best since being diagnosed, but I feel like it is important.  I make a lot of jokes about narcolepsy but there are some things that I need those closest to me to know...so why not write it in a a blog?

I need you to know that I feel like I am not in control of my own life.  As my symptoms get worse, I feel like there is little that I can do.  For those of you who know me best, you know how much I hate this.

I need you to know that I will always be your token narcoleptic friend.  Narcolepsy has to be good for something right?

I need you to know that I often downplay how I feel, so if I say I'm tired or have a headache, I really do.  I hate feeling weak and I feel weak all the time.

I need you to know that when I turn down hanging out or leave somewhere early, it is extremely hard for me.

I need you to know that every day is not the same.  There are days I feel fine and there are days I feel completely dead, and I have no way of knowing how I will feel on a given day (or given minute).

I need you to know that my depression and anxiety is only made worse with narcolepsy.

I need you to know that I 100% understand why I get left out of plans, but that doesn't make it hurt any less.

But above all, I need you to know that I am still the same person who would drop anything for any one of you...no matter how tired I am.

I have an AMAZING support system.  Thank you guys for being my strength.

Time for a nap...
LS